Amazon’s 5-Star Theater
AKA Welcome to the Party, Guys
What do you get when you put a much of ad execs in a room together and task them with that age old assignment to sell sell sell?
I don’t know, you probably get about 5 different commercials for 5 different companies and products where some bemused buffoon states “I didn’t know buffalos had wings,” all within the same 15-month period.
What I’m saying is, there’s nothing new under the sun, and if the ad execs think they’ve caught lightning in a bottle with some funny joke, some fresh take, then chances are we peons unearthed it ages ago, dusted it off, and have used it as we liked for some time now.
Like taking ridiculous Amazon reviews and pointing out how funny it is when they are read out of their original context. Unique. Clever. The kind of thing that requires Benedict Cumberbatch and Adam Driver’s talents to make funny.
Or two Midwestern jokesters with internet connections and microphones. But I digress. Amazon.
Reviews Are Funny
You know this. Amazon knows this. At one time Amazon had multiple pages that THEY PUBLISHED highlighting the latest and greatest of “ridiculous and outrageous reviews,” back in the heyday of Three Wolf Moon Shirts, Hutzler Banana Slicers, and the early 2000s novelty that was a gallon of milk available for purchase ONLINE (for blogs on these items, the Gummy Bears that make you poop, and more, see our Me, You, and Meme Reviews page).
So Amazon knows you love this stuff. That’s why in 2024, when all the old ideas were new once again, they hired Adam Driver for commercials titled 5-Star Theater, in which a serious, dramatic actor reads a silly Amazon review.
And what did they lead off with?
The damn banana slicer. The obviously fake, the meme before memes were memes, clearly not a real review and reason we took up the task of really reviewing banana slicers, Bic for Her pens, and so on. They. Chose. That.
See, the problem with Meme reviews is that they sound fake even when you’re reading them, so getting a real actor to try to make them sound real? It falls flat.
Other examples are more successful, and the campaign did well enough not only to WIN A BRONZE LION at the Cannes Film Festival (because an ad is a film, I guess?), but also to get “renewed” for a second season of commercials, this time featuring Benedict Cumberbatch.
Look, I won’t say we’re more talented than them. Or even that we had the idea to poke fun at silly reviews first.
But think about this: this is, in theory, Amazon selling you more Amazon, by using YOUR REVIEWS ON AMAZON!!! That’s a twisted little cycle.
We’re not selling you anything but more silliness and hopefully a shirt or something. So think about that this holiday season.
