Today's topics include martinis, bottles of sparkly, processed jelly, uncomfortable undertones, being quirky, Animorphs, consciousness, an energetic pull, ultimate sportsmanship, and ham.

Today’s topics include sexy Animorphs, slightly longer than normal shorts, the book world, prison stuff, frosty mugs that carry root beer, the spirit of the stairway, a plane beyond five stars, piles of fries, Video Gold Mine, modern trolling and hatred, how we do it, and fictional human interactions.

Today’s topics include always being outside with a banana and a stick, definitely garbage, How-To guides, the slaps of the keys, the face of a strangler, fish bowl drinks, Bocelli, having fun, The Review Game, Thanos’ nipples, and blocks of paint.

Today’s topics include pillars of salt, edible puddy, the intersection of crackers and cheese, the four slivers of a man’s heart, bungalows, popsicles, The Fourth Pleasure, the Peterman Catalog, and hot steamy dragon time.

Today's topics include holding up the moon that is society, ground-penetrating radar, little Mt. Rushmore, time, chaos, jokes, anti-gravity yoga pants, Nicole 666, putting the baja on blast, and baby daddies.

Today's topics include balls you can throw, ruckus, cabinet creeping, seedy demons, Stair Boy, The Hoboken chicken Emergency, not enjoying Fraser, and Quirky neighbors.

Today’s topics include Timmy OJ, candy shrapnel, peppermint porcupines, Army boy swagger, being cool and casual, getting decently drunk, dirty filthy swamp music, Elon Musk and the blue check mark, Kwik Trip trips, and little butt cheeks.

Today's topics include rainbow vomit, fridge, engines and ingots, cinnamon buns, hot-sick Christmas, pudding, yelling "Bumblebee!", beers, Snapchat, creamy clam chowder, and the memories of a bottle.

Today's topics include the Mona Lisa, tongues in cheeks, pajama pants problems, the children, transcending the human form, riptide, raiding the woof, Frankenstein (again!) and the value of human life.

Today's topics include stupid beads, lent, hobby lobbyist, Hell, whippin', bike type dudes, off-hours pumpkin patch, dinosaur shows, being a ham guy, a different drummer, P-spicers, a sneaky little sausage, and going paperless.

Today's topics include hoochie bars and hoochie Halloween outfits, dressing like a McDonald's worker with teased hair and makeup, monthly supplements of candy corn, and being 13, just lying for money. Plus, a special look at historical reviews of Frankenstein (1931).

Today’s topics include sweat, cool graphics, Coca Cola, volleyball, bad blueberries, spices and salts, broth, guy bubbling, Chainsaw Man, thrusting, and flying wolves.

This weeks topics include hot balls, a little thumb humor, feet soup, sharks in the garden, super raccoons, eating poison, evolving rapidly, chocolate cupcakes, more yoga pants, a remarkable level of spice, and logistics.

Today’s topics include icebergs, joints, The Rock, little yellow dudes, non-disco dazzlers, an untickled laugh, hygiene tools, scrub sessions, goldfish smells, leggings, dirty mirrors, and green tea except it pisses you off.

Today’s topics include serial jizzers, the Ultimate Relationship, cozy yurts, Good Burger, motorcycles, sword arms, dark crystal meth, our Judge Dredd era, real voodoo dolls, deep dish, hourglasses, and the finer points of excavating.

Today’s topics include Ohio, plasma power, shih tzus, “catch”, sniffing, mayonnaise squeeze-ums, bread blasts, crows!, Robocop-style justice, and bear shifters(again).

Today’s topics include non-gamer friends, a series of crouches, greasy joints, standing around with boots and clipboard, feet peeling, Sonic 2, cabin fever incarnate, stretchy vines, and damning a lot of people to Hell.

Today's topics include a whole rabbit hole, modded hot dog rollers (seriously), a standard sized boy, TMI, Warhammer 40k, stew, rivals, earth-shattering intimacy, silly string, flex emojis, and the sandblasting lifestyle.

Today’s topics include “me”, being a slave to cola, deleting contacts, microplastics, convincing yourself that those pants were a good purchase, cope, the Peter Pan Micheal Jackson Freddy Kruger costume, a miserable time, tokens, amusement, and warm vocal cords.

Today's topics include Creed music video vibes, becoming a human Snapple, sensually planting succulents, staplers covered in maple syrup, Blood Oathman, Gumby, Kramer in the Water, and damn rats.